Alcohol and drug abuse is the source of many problems for those who are engaged in addictive behaviours. One of the earliest casualties from substance abuse will be intimacy. It is very difficult for people to abuse mind-altering substances on a regular basis and maintain healthy relationships. As a person falls deeper and deeper into addiction, it will completely take over their life and there will be little room for anyone else. As people become more disconnected from their true feelings and needs, due to suppression by substances, they become less able to communicate them in their relationships, which in turn become more superficial and less gratifying.
We grow up hearing a lot about emotions, “boys don’t cry”, “suck it up” “get a grip” “look on the bright side” “pull your socks up”and numerous other sayings that encourage us to “put up or shut up” and avoid expressing “negative” emotions. No doubt the intention behind these sayings is well-meaning – an attempt to encourage us to be happy and positive, but actually, messages that encourage us to hide, suppress, avoid or judge our emotions are downright dangerous. Misconceptions about emotions are the primary obstacle to developing emotional intelligence.